10 Steps to Become a North Korean Marketer
Step 1. Eliminate Your Sales Funnel – There is no need for a top of the funnel when the bottom is most important.
Step 2. All CTAs are now OTAs (orders to action) – Don’t ask someone to click, MAKE THEM CLICK
Step 3. Every landing page delivers the “Why Our Company is Awesome eBook”. CLICK HERE NOW
Step 4. Your Tweets Wage Psychological Warfare on Your Followers
Step 5. Your Facebook account serves as a fundamental element to your propaganda campaign
Step 6. Be sure to place a photo of your CEO on every page to reinforce who’s in charge (note: a smile will weaken your brand)
Step 7. Nurturing programs are now a blitzkrieg campaign (start with the sales pitch and end with the sales pitch)
Step 8. Any words against the company will be punishable by death
Step 9. Form fields should be challenging and plentiful. Click here for our “Why Our Company is Awesome” eBook. All offer pages, no matter the quality of the offer, should ask for as much information from the user as possible.
Step 10. WHEN CREATING A TOP 10 BLOG POST, THE LAST ITEM SHOULD BE IN ALL CAPS TO EMPHASIZE THE LAST POINT.